Because I was ‘Joe varsity jock’ in high school, I met a lot of guys from other schools. They all had one question (asked with a smirk): “Is it true what they say that all the girls in your school are stuck up?”
Well, yes and no. Let’s swish this wine around, shall we?
Rich town was a very insular place in the 60’s. It wasn’t hard to keep track of anyone. There were only two hairdressers and all women/girls went there. One or two local dress shops. As I alluded to earlier, 2 or 3 ‘members only’ restaurants. The playground (‘Happy Hollow’) was huge, as was the pavilion. One swimming pool, and by the late sixties, they moved to a much larger pool. Clubs considered passe today were very active–Optimists, Shrine, Rotary, Lions, etc. And of course, the PTA. Bridge clubs flourished, formal ones and informal ones. There also was a local Women’s Club–this organization was everywhere from the 50’s into the 70’s.
The center of kids’ universe was a three-story old stone house that sat on park land. Membership only, passed on from hand to hand. Its primary use was bridge for the oldsters, but as you will see, they courted the young folks and it reinforced the status quo.
Parents socialized a lot. And in a town like this, you had more than your share of keeping up with the Jones–clothes, houses, cars, birthday parties (with magicians or clowns or ponies), snotty grandmas and grandpas eager to tell you about the good old days. Ballet lessons, piano lessons, singing lessons–don’t let anyone tell you there wasn’t intense competition back then. Hell, many of those girls knew what fork to use before they knew what JFK stood for.
Girls back-stroking in this materialistic stew were adored from birth, spoiled by many people’s standards. They were raised to be the best, the prettiest, the epitome of style. They weren’t born, they were made. In many ways, becoming snotty was out of their control. The Debutante Balls (aka ‘coming out’ parties) for girls becoming teenagers were pretty much smothered by the time I was in school, but later, you will see how the older generation refused to let it die.
When everyone tells you what a darling you are, it’s hard to go into your teenage years without thinking (scratch that: KNOWING) you are something that every other girl wants to be, and an object d’art every boy wants to gaze upon wantonly.
Junior High School sifted wheat from chaff. You didn’t find too many Malachi Constants in this borough, but junior high began to sort them out. We could have used Harry’s ‘Sorting Hat’ ! Girls found their true nerd, or became arty/rebellious. By high school, the really snotty ones wanted no parts of lower girls or any boys at all; I remember one girl in particular seemed always angry she wasn’t in a private school. Every school had its ‘poor little rich girls’ right?
But no, by then, lumping ‘all’ girls in a statement was just not true–the nerds fell out, the shy ones stayed home, the arty ones dreamed and sketched. The rest wanted to have fun and enjoy life–whether that meant partying or doing the horizontal bop with your bf. But as I’ve aged and seen kids in my extended family grow, I remembered rich town had a LOT of girls who didn’t socialize–hell, some of them didn’t even form cliques.
But maybe I was too tolerant back then. These boys who asked me ‘the question’ came from areas considered farming communities, where neighbors weren’t nearby and girls were brought up respecting the land and those that worked on it (if they didn’t work it themselves!).
This song has a number of dead on observations that apply here, it also has an in joke for me that would take too long to explain. JG will know if she stops by.